I couldn’t repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
Eagles may soar, but weasels don’t get sucked into jet engines.
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.
The one unforgivable sin is to be boring.
Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.
We are now cruising at a level of two to the power of twenty-five thousand to one against and falling, and we will be restoring normality just as soon as we are sure what is normal anyway.
The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don’t.
If there’s anything more important than my ego around, I want it caught and shot now.
Would it save you a lot of time if I just gave up and went mad now?
The difference between us and a computer is that, the computer is blindingly stupid, but it is capable of being stupid many, many million times a second.
Death: Human beings make life so interesting. Do you know, that in a universe so full of wonders, they have managed to invent boredom.
Always remember that the crowd that applauds your coronation is the same crowd that will applaud your beheading. People like a show.
Geography is just physics slowed down, with a couple of trees stuck in it.
Go on, prove me wrong. Destroy the fabric of the universe. See if I care.
Things just happen. What the hell.
Of course I’m sane, when trees start talking to me, I don’t talk back.
Make love, not war. Unless you’re Loki, in which case: do what you want.
Oh sorry, I was taking life seriously.
Sometimes the road less traveled is less traveled for a reason.
My mind reels with sarcastic replies.